In Defense of Furries

So in the last couple of months I’ve been noticing some anti-furry sentiment in the koornbeurs. From what I understand, it mostly has to do with a specific group of people that have been causing some nuisance, but I’ve been hearing more general comments as well and feel kinda iffy about that.

Honestly, this article is just a collection of thoughts on the topic that have been brewing in my head for a while. It’s not just about the koornbeurs, but I’m writing about it here because it feels relevant and because I need somewhere to vent.

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I’ve grown up as a dumbass kid on the internet, I’ve seen how furries are often treated as a punching bag to make fun of. They’re weird and cringe and all that. And it’s generally sort of socially accepted to make fun of them. And as a dumbass kid growing up on the internet, I laughed along.

But that was a while ago. And as a queer person, I’ve also seen that same attitude towards gay and trans people. People will joke about us, ostracize us, and sometimes even wish harm upon us in a very similar way. And of course it’s not always that extreme, but even in the more casual jokes that underlying sentiment of weirdness is still noticeably there.

And I’ve seen that sentiment about furries in the koornbeurs. Most of the jokes and remarks that rubbed me the wrong way weren’t even necessarily particularly cruel or mean. Sure I’ve heard a few that were out of line, but most of them seem pretty harmless. And probably not a single one was said with malicious intent. So why am I complaining here?

Because I think that regardless of intent, these comments signal to each other that we as a group all think furries as weird. They establish a social norm. People bond through humor, and every little casual joke gradually reinforces that collective belief. And to people not part of the in-group, it signals that we categorically see furries as outsiders.

A quick joke such as “furries are pushing the boundaries of our wokeness”, a quick laugh, and the conversation moves on. Nothing extreme or particularly hostile, but it sets a tone.

And I know I’m sounding a bit preachy here. Maybe I’m overreacting, but I genuinely think that this type of ‘othering’ can be very harmful. It signals to a minority group that they are not seen as part of the larger group. Not safe to express themselves. Not welcome.

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One of the things I like so much about the koornbeurs is its inclusivity with regards to queer people. We’re not explicitly an LGBTQ association, but being gay or bi almost goes without saying. It’s just not a Big Deal™ anymore. In recent years, we’ve had a ton of trans and nonbinary members as well, though I’ve heard from older members that this is actually still a pretty new development.

And I do think it’s fair to say trans people are becoming more widely accepted nowadays. In some circles at least. But sometimes it seems like we’re still equally quick to marginalize other groups of people we consider ‘weird’. We’ve just shifted our definitions of what we consider normal to include more people, but that’s not enough. We need to reflect more critically on our tendency to ‘other’ people we do not understand.

Dutch people pride themselves on their tolerance, but this is often pretty surface-level. It usually comes down to a sort of understanding that “as long as whatever you’re doing doesn’t affect me I’m not gonna meddle with it”. In effect: as a trans person I probably won’t get hatecrimed on the street, but the average Dutch person doesn’t feel particularly inclined to fight for my rights either. I think we should move past this “tolerance” and try to reach for true acceptance, understanding and inclusion.

So what can we do? I think the first step is to be more introspective about our own biases and behavior. It’s important to hold ourselves and each other accountable. If you hear someone making a casual joke or remark that you feel a little iffy about, let them know. It’s okay if it means “ruining the mood” once in a while. It might make all the difference to someone listening in on the conversation.